harry potter and the muggle band
by unknownchick
Summary: what happens when the band good charlotte and their friends meet with harry potter and his friends? bad summary i know just read the story its better then it sounds
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The guys of Good Charlotte were heading back to their hotel room they were staying at after playing a show in London. When they got there, none of them could stay still for a second because of all the hype from the concert. Joel and Benji were listening to the new Rancid CD, Billy and Chris were getting changed to got out and Paul was yelling at the video game he was playing.  
"Damn ducks, why can't you just sit there and let me shoot you!" Distant yelling in the background broke Paul's concentration. He started imaging Benji and Joel's heads on the ducks. Paul started laughing stupidly at the screen, until Billy hit him upside the head with the duck-hunt gun. "What the fuck is your problem you dumbass?" Billy shouted at Paul while walking back to his room to finish changing.  
Paul flipped Billy off and went back to playing his game.  
In the room next to Billy's, you could hear Joel and Benji yelling at each other over the music that was playing.  
"Benji! For the millionth time, shut the hell up about being in the 'Fall Back Down' video!" Joel yelled and threw a pillow at Benji's head. Benji caught it and threw it back making it hit Joel right smack in the face.  
"You're just jealous 'cause Tim didn't want you in the video!" "I'm not jealous Benji, just shut up about it geez!" "You're jealous! You're jealous!" Benji sang that over and over while dancing around Joel, aggravating him more and more. "You're jealous! You're acting just how you did when Tony wanted me to sing 'Jaded' with him and not you!" Benji pointed his tattooed finger at Joel while he said this to him.  
"I guess we know who the better twin is now, don't we!" "I've had it!" At this Joel jumped Benji and tackled him to the ground and they started wrestling.  
While this is going on in the room, Paul gave up on his video game and started watching TV Billy and Chris finally came out of their room and went over to Paul.  
"Are those two at it again?" Chris asked with annoyed look on his face. "Ya" Paul said without taking his eyes from the screen. "What was it this time?" Billy asks. "The Rancid video." Paul replied in a flat tone. "I should have known." Billy and Chris said at the same time, looking at there own "twin moment". "Whatever." Chris mumbled.  
"Why are they doing this again? I mean, last week it was the Mest video. When are they gonna stop acting like that!" Billy said. "Who knows." Paul replied, still not looking at them.   
"Well were gonna go look for a place to get some drinks. You sure you don't want to come Paul?" Chris asked. "Ya, I'm sure, anyways someone's got to be here to break those two up when they really start going at it." Paul said while pointing with his thumb at the twin's door where you could still hear them yelling at each other. "Ok...see ya when we get back then!" Billy yelled to Paul as he and Chris were walking out the door.

(Billy and Chris walking down a street)

"Lets take a detour through this alley?" points Billy. "It'll probably end up being shorter" "Ok" shrugs Chris, "Sounds good to me." So Billy and Chris started walking down the dark, deserted alley. "Hey, look, there's a door over there!" says Billy as he started walking towards it. "What are you talking about?" asked Chris sounding a little confused. "I don't see a door anywhere dumbass, what'd I tell you about those drugs Billy?" states Chris.  
"Shut up Chris! I told you I stopped doing that shit. After I said I was married to my crack in that interview, then I knew it was time to stop." Billy said. "Well, I still don't see a door." Chris stated with his hands on his hips. "Well then you can stand here, being a little bitch, and I'll go see what it is." Billy said as he started walking towards the  
door. "Billy you have seriously crossed the line to Crazyvile." Chris said  
to himself. "Look there's a sign above the door!" Billy pointed towards it while standing in front of the door.  
"The Leaky Cauldron." Billy read out loud. "We've found a bar! I'm so there." Billy yelled. "Billy for the last time! There is no door, there is no sign! You're seeing..." Chris trailed off as Billy pulled open the door to the bar. "Where the hell did that door come from." Chris stated more then asked. "Are you coming or what?" Billy asked. "...ya." Chris  
replied.  
Before walking into the bar, Chris stood there rubbing his eyes thinking that he must have been seeing things. When his eyes came back into focus, there was Billy holding the door open for him to walk through. Chris went in and Billy followed in.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Inside the bar there were many colorful people to put it in kind words. There were really ugly women wearing ragged robes, men who were wearing cloaks and what could have passed as bathrobes and just plain 'odd' people.  
"These people look stranger than Benji does all the time" Chris thought to himself.  
Billy and Chris walked over to the bar area and sat down besides a very large bearded man. Chris was staring at him and didn't even notice the bartender who had come over to take their orders.  
"What can I get ya?" the bartender asked. Chris jumped in surprise.  
"Um... I'll have a sex on the beach. Thanks." Billy said. The bartender gave him a weird look at what he said.  
"I don't know what that is, but how about a butter beer or a fire whiskey?"  
Billy shrugged, "Uh, a butter beer I guess."  
The bartender then turned to Chris, "And what can I get ya?"  
"Eh what the hell?" Chris said getting caught off guard, "I'll have a fire whiskey" He replied curiously, as he throws the giant man next to him a sideways glance. Chris scooted his chair a little towards Billy, now in fear of the big guy.  
"Man Chris, how many times do I have to tell you I don't swing that way! So back off!" Billy half shouts at Chris.  
"What's yer problem there lad?" asks the big guy as Chris jumps and grabs onto Billy.  
"Oops didn't mean ter startle ya, I'm Hagrid, game keeper at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry!" he explains proudly beaming.  
"I-I-I-I..." Chris trailed off.  
"I'm Billy and this idiot here is Chris." says Billy flatly, trying to get Chris to let go of him.  
"We're two members of the band Good Charlotte" finishes Billy, finally breaking free of Chris's death grip on his arm.  
The bartender came back with their order moments later. Billy took a sipped of his butter beer "What the fuck! This doesn't taste anything like beer!" he yelled.  
Chris took his whiskey and drank it all in one shot and pounded his drink trying to look "manly" to make up for how he acted earlier. Instead, he chocked on it. Billy busted up laughing at Chris's attempt at trying to look cool and shot him a death glare.  
"So," boomed hagrid, breaking the awkward moment. " What school are you two lads from?"  
"Umm... La Plata high", stated Billy a little unsure.  
" Don't you know anything about Good Charlotte?" asks Chris, a little agitated at this point.  
"What in bloody hell is Good Charlotte?" Hagrid half - yelled looking a little bemused with the two.  
Both Billy and Chris jumped at Hagrid's voice, a little scared now. "It's the band that we're in Billy answered.  
"A band eh? What kind of music do you lads play? witchwollow, poppin' adds? What?" Hagrid asked Billy.  
"Uh... pop-punk?" Chris said.  
"What's pop-punk? I've never heard of THAT before! Where are you two from 'cause you don't seem to be from around here?" Hagrid replied.   
"Where from Waldorf, Maryland back in the US." Billy said.  
"Oh! Okay so you lads must of gone to Devorox School in Louisiana?" Hagrid asked.  
"No." Chris answered  
"So, than Saunderson's in Salem?" Hagrid asked again.  
"Uh no! I told you already, we went to La Plata High!" Billy replied getting a little pissed at this guy.  
"Never heard of it. Anyways, what kinda wand do ya use?" Hagrid said and asked.  
"Wand?" Chris said with a confused look on his face.  
"Ya what ya use for magic" Hagrid said.  
Chris shook his head in disbelief at the guy. "Magic?"  
Hagrid glanced between the two guys sitting next to him, " Oh no."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"Oh no! What does that mean!" Chris asked a little worried now.

"Ya not a wizard, are ya boy?" Hagrid asked while staring Chris in the eye.

"No" Chris said, "Wizards don't exist. Are you crazy!"

Hagrid shook his head. "How the hell did you find this place then!" Hagrid yelled.

Christ pointed his shacking finger at Billy who was drinking his third or fourth butter beer. "Billy found this place." Chris answered with a shaky voice.

Billy looked up at the sound of his name being said and looked at his drink then at Chris. "I swear dude, this fucking beer has not the smallest amount of alcohol in it and it's pissing me off!" He said to Chris while throwing daggers at his mug of butter beer.

"Of course it don't" Hagrid said, "You'd have to drink a few barrel fulls o' those to get drunk off that! Anyways, you didn't let your friend here know yer a wizard, eh?"

Billy gave the guy a weird look, "Of course I didn't...wait a wizard? I'm not a fucking wizard! What the hell man are you crazy or something?"

Hagrid laughed. "Well lad, only wizards can find this place." Chris looked back and forth between Billy and Hagrid with a confused look written on his face.

"You're a wizard Bill? Why didn't you tell me?" He questioned Billy.

" Na dude, let's get the hell outa here. This place is fucked in the head!" Billy said and stood up from the bar stool. He and Chris put down their money for the drinks and were headed towards the door, when the bartender called out to them.

"Hey you two! ya forgot to pay!"

"We did pay! The moneys right there!" they both said. The bartender looked at the dollar bills they had left to pay for the drinks.

""I don't see any money here and you forgot these pieces of paper here!" The bartender replied.

Chris and Billy both looked confused at each other and the bartender, "its okay lads, it's on me" Hagrid said as he pulled out a sack and dumped a few gold coins onto the counter. The bartender picked up the coins and handed them back their money. Chris and Billy thanked Hagrid and left that bar as fast as they could.

(Back at the hotel)

Benji and Joel were having a pillow fight and Paul was asleep on the couch in the living room with the duck hunt gun still in his hands.

"What the fuck is going on here!" Shouted a voice from the hotel room door. "Is this a party we weren't invited too?"

"Tony!" Shouted Benji, busting a pillow on Matt's head.

"What the hell is up man?"

" Nothin much Benj. Where is everyone and why the fucks are you and Joel having a pillow fight?" Tony asked.

Before Benji had the chance to answer, Joel came up behind him and smacked him upside the back of the head. Benji turned around and was smacked again, but in the face this time with a pillow by Matt.

"What the hell Matt!"

"That's what you get for busting a pillow open on me!" Matt said while still trying to get the feathers out of his hair. "Oh, and Joel's right behind you"

""What?" As Benji turned around again, he got hit by a pillow by Joel.

"Your it!" Joel yelled and took off running down the hallway.

"I'm soooo not it, your it Joel!" Benji said as he took off, running after Joel, leaving a confused Tony and Matt standing there, wondering what the hell those two were smoking to make them so fucking giddy.

"What the hell is going on? Did we walk right in to the twilight zone or what?" Matt asked Tony.

"Who the hell knows." Tony said back.

Matt and Tony walked into the kitchen, looking for something to eat, leaving the twins alone.

Benji kept chasing Joel around the hotel room. Joel jumped over the sleeping form know as Paul, but when Benji tried, he failed, falling onto Paul, making the duck hunt gun come down hard on his groin.

"WHAT THE FUCK!" Paul screamed in a high pitched voice.

Benji was lying in Paul's lap looking up at him. "Your it?" Benji said and busted out laughing so hard that he started crying. Paul pushed him off his lap, making Benji land on the ground next to Joel who was also on the floor laughing.

"What the fuck is wrong and who the hell screamed like a girl?" Tony yelled coming into the room with beer in his hands and Matt following behind him with food.

"I did!" Paul yelled back still in a high pitch voice.

"I need some ice." Paul waddled out of the living room into the kitchen while grabbing at his balls.

Matt and Tony watched Paul walk into the kitchen and then looked back at the twins, wondering what could have happened.

"What did you guys do to Paul? He's walking like a penguin." Matt said.

"Ben-Ben-Benji fell on-on Paul and-and Benj fell on the gun... making it hit Paul in the balls!" Joel finally got out while laughing and doing hand motions.

"Damn! You two morons couldn't wait until I was in the room to see it happen!" Tony yelled stomping his foot like a 5-year-old.

"Sorry Tone, spare of the moment type thing." Benji replied out of breath from laughing so hard.

They all settled down on the couch after all the chaos that took place and decided to watch a movie. Paul still hadn't returned from the kitchen, but nobody noticed or seemed to care. The guys weren't worried because every once and awhile you would hear an "Ow!" or a yelp from the kitchen.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

After about an half hour, the guys got bored with the movie and didn't know what to do now, until Tony got one of his ' Tone-ariffic' ideas, as Benji would put it.

"Hey guys, how about we fill up some water balloons and have a water balloon fight!" Tony said.

"In the hotel room Tony?" Joel asked.

"No Joel outside, dumbass of course inside, that's the best part of the idea, don't you agree Benji, Matt?"

"I'm so in Tone!" Benji replied.

"I'm up for it" Matt said

"Joel?" Tony asked looking at Joel.

"Okay, I'm in." Joel answered.

They got up and went to frill the water balloons up that all of a sudden Tony had. After filing them, they went back into the living room.

"Okay guys let's split up into teams. Who wants to be lucky and get partnered up with the T-dawg?" Tony said.

Benji pushed Matt and Joel aside and ran to stand next to Tony.

"I'm with T-dawg! You hoe-bags can be partners!" Benji said to Joel and Matt with a smirk on his face.

"That's fine Benjamin, But just to let you two morons know, you bitches are going down!" Matt said to Benji.

"Oh it's on dear cousin of mine!" Tony said to Matt.

"Oh my dear Benjiahole, Joely Moley's foot is going up your ass!" Joel said to Benji.

"What the hell Joel! That made no sense at all!" Benji replied.

"I suck at this okay!" Joel yelled at Benji, going rosy in the cheeks.

"Okay let's get this shit started!"

As that was said Tony threw a balloon at Matt hitting him in the chest. Joel threw one at Benji hitting him in the ass.

"Fuck! My ass is wet!" Benji yelled.

Joel got hit in the face with a balloon and when he wiped his face his eyeliner had started running down his cheeks making it look like as if he had "Benji makeup" on. Everything in the hotel was not safe from the four.

No one heard the frantic knocking at the door or saw Billy and Chris come running into the hotel room like as if the dear lives depended on them getting into the room.

"Guys! Guys! I want to go home now! There are freaks here that are scarier than putting Benji and Tony together!" Chris yelled.

"There sucks ass! And they think "magic" really exists!" Billy yelled while throwing his arms in the air for a more dramatic effect.

Paul finally came out of the kitchen, still walking like a penguin, to see what was going on with all the yelling.

"What the hell is with all the-"Paul was cut off by four water balloons hitting him.

The balloons were aimed at Billy and Chris, but when the guys threw them Billy and Chris ducked which made the balloons hit Paul instead.

"What the fuck! Is this 'all pick on Paul' day and I didn't get the memo or something!" Paul more stated then asked. "First Benji's fat ass falls on me while I'm asleep on the couch making the stupid duck hunt gun hit me in the balls and now I'm drenched in water by balloons! Oh! And let me guess, this was Tony's idea right? Well, thank you fuckin much Tony!"

After Paul finished ranting and raving at the guys, he some what stormed (or waddled really fast, whatever you prefer) off to his room.

"Wait! Wait Paul!"

Paul turned around and faced Tony, hoping to get a 'sorry' from him, but knew better and was ready for a smartass comment.

"Hey Paul, shall I get the smallest man on earth with the tiniest violin to play the saddest little song just for you?" Tony said and started laughing.

Paul replied by saying "fuck you" and flipping him off before slamming his bedroom door shut.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Benji, Matt, Joel, and Tony were cracking up laughing at Paul, while Chris and Billy were still standing in front of the door confused as all hell about what was going on.

"Okay, okay no more laughing! Please! No more!" Matt said to himself.

"Can you four dickheads stop laughing and explain to us what is so funny and what's wrong with Paul!" Chris yelled at the four.

Billy went into the kitchen for a second and when he came back he had the sprayer from the sink.

"Move Chris." Billy said.

Chris moved and Billy sprayed Tony, Matt, Benji, and Joel, getting them good. Billy got the guys to stop laughing after that move and got them really pissed too.

"What the hell was that for Billy, you didn't have to spay us with water!" Matt yelled at Billy.

"Yea well, at least we have your attention now don't we?" Chris said to Matt.

"Yea what was with you two? You came running in, both yelling shit at the same time. What were you saying to us?" Joel asked.

"Well I asked you guys first. What happen to Paul?" Chris asked again.

They all sat down and Benji explained about what had happen to Paul when Chris and Billy weren't there.

"Damn! That must a hurt like a bitch!" Chris said.

"It hurt for him but for us it was fuckin funny as all hell!" Joel said laughing a little at the memory.

"So what the fuck happen to you two?" Matt asked.

"You guys won't believe what happened and the shit we have been through tonight!" Chris said getting all excited to tell them.

"Ok we're walking down this alley and Billy finds a bar, which I may add I did not see, anyways we go in there and there fuckin freaks in there! I mean ya Benji and Billy are freaks, but these people were 10 times worse. We sit next to this guy and he starts talking to us and everything and then-"

"Can we get to the point here; I mean by the time you finish, I'll be too old to enjoy Britney making out with Madonna again!" Tony said.

"I'll right I'm going, anyways to make the story short, for Tony! This guy thinks magic exists and that Billy is a wizard!" Chris finished

"And may I add that the beer here sucks ass!" Billy said to add his two cents to the story.

"The guy must have been smoking something! I mean magic! Ya right!" Joel said.

"I don't believe you two!" Tony said.

"Ya either do I." matt replied.

"Benji what do you think happened? Do you believe us?" Chris asked looking at Benji.

"I don't know Chris I mean this happened in a bar…" Benji answered.

"Fine! I'll show you all that this really happened and there is such a bar!" Chris said and walked to his room and slammed the door shut.

Joel turned around and faced Billy,

"Did this really happen Bill? I mean was Chris telling the truth or just bullshitting us?" Joel asked Billy.

"You want the truth Joel? It really did happen this guy really thought magic was real" Billy said.

Joel shrugged and walked towards the bedroom door and before going in turned and looked at the guys.

"I'm going to bed. To much shit has happened today, night guys!" and with that said Joel shut the door.

Billy said good night and went to bed leaving just Benji, Matt, and Tony.

"Well I'm gonna follow my brother's lead go to bed, night fuckers!" Benji said to Tony and Matt.

He started walking towards his and Joel's bedroom door and before he got a chance to walk in Tony called after him.

"Hey! Where the hell is me and Matt suppose to sleep!"

Benji was standing between the door and its frame when he turned and looked at Tony and Matt.

"There's a couch there, use it. Night!" Benji said answering Tony's question and before Tony and Matt got a chance to argue he closed the door and locked it.

Tony and Matt looked at each other, and then took off running towards the couch. Matt tripped Tony making him fall forward and land flat on his face.

"Asshole" Tony mumbled on the ground. Matt made it to the couch and jumped, landing on it.

'I guess you'll be sleeping on the floor tonight T-dawg!" Matt said to Tony, turning over from him.

"Fuck you man!" Tony said to Matt.

"Night Anthony, love you too!" Matt said and went to sleep.

Tony glared at Matt and finally settled down on the floor and went to sleep.


End file.
